No one is perfect, and that includes during arguments. We all make mistakes, but there are some things that you should definitely avoid doing if you want to get through the argument unscathed.
In this article, we will discuss 10 of the most common things people do wrong during an argument. Keep these in mind the next time you find yourself in a heated discussion with your loved ones – or even worse, complete strangers!
Argument Resolution Mistakes to Avoid
Conflict resolution can be a tricky process, especially if you don’t know what you’re doing. In order to make the process as smooth as possible, it’s important to avoid making common mistakes. Here are some of the most common conflict resolution mistakes that people make and how to avoid them.
#1 – Avoiding Conflict Altogether
One of the biggest mistakes you can make is avoiding conflict altogether. This might seem like the best way to avoid an argument, but it will only lead to more problems down the road. Ignoring your differences will not make them go away – it will only make them worse.
If you have something that is bothering you, it is important to address it head-on. By avoiding conflict, you are only making things worse for yourself – and your relationship.
#2 – Being Defensive
When you are in an argument, it is important to remember that you are not the only one involved. There are two (or more) sides to every story, and it is important to listen to what the other person has to say.
Defending yourself will only make the situation worse. It is important to stay calm and open-minded, and to remember that you are both working towards the same goal – resolving the conflict.
#3 – Overgeneralizing
An argument is not the time to bring up every single thing that has ever bothered you. This will only serve to escalate the situation and make it harder to resolve the conflict.
Focus on the issue at hand, and try to stay as calm and rational as possible.
#4 – Being Right
It is important to remember that being right is not the most important thing. What is more important is finding a resolution that works for both of you.
Arguing just for the sake of being right will only make the situation worse and drag out the conflict.
Try to see things from the other person’s perspective, and be willing to compromise.
#5 – Mind-Reading
Mind-reading is a huge mistake that people make during arguments. Just because you think you know what the other person is thinking, doesn’t mean you do.
Don’t assume that you know what the other person is thinking or feeling. Instead, ask them directly. This will help to avoid miscommunications and misunderstandings.
#6 – Forgetting to Listen
In the heat of an argument, it’s easy to forget to actually listen to what the other person is saying.
You may be so focused on getting your point across that you’re not taking in what they’re trying to tell you.
Arguments are a two-way street, so make sure you’re listening as well as speaking.
#7 – Playing the Blame Game
When you’re in an argument, it’s easy to start placing blame on the other person.
However, this will only make the situation worse.
Instead of pointing fingers, try to take responsibility for your own actions and apologize if necessary.
This will diffuses the situation and help to resolve the issue at hand.
#8 – Trying to “Win” the Argument
In every argument, there is no winner or loser.
Both parties are simply trying to express their own opinion and reach a compromise.
If you go into an argument thinking that you need to come out on top, it will only make things worse.
Both sides need to be willing to give a little in order to reach an agreement.
#9 – Making Character Attacks
When you start to attack someone’s character, it only makes them defensive and less likely to listen to what you have to say.
Stick to the facts and avoid name-calling or making assumptions about someone’s motives.
#10 – Stonewalling
Stonewalling is when one person completely shuts down and stops responding to the other person.
This only makes the situation worse and prevents any sort of resolution.
Both sides need to be willing to communicate in order to reach a compromise.
If you find yourself stonewalling, take a step back and try to see things from the other person’s perspective.
No one ever said that arguments were easy, but with a little bit of practice you can learn how to avoid doing these things. By following our simple tips, you and your partner can start to have more productive disagreements that lead to better communication in your relationship. What are some other things you think should be avoided during an argument? Sound off in the comments below!